Flowing water never goes bad.
Chinese Proverb

You are a gardener. Your plot of land is your consciousness. This is the ground where you plant the garden you live in. It is open and fertile and it will support any dream you can conceive. And from the moment of your birth, each and every moment, a new delivery arrives from the generosity of the universe. These deliveries are infinite and inexhaustible; coordinated by the universe to ensure that you always have available precisely what you need to realize your personal garden.

As a child, you happily drink in these gifts, assembling them unselfconsciously; enthusiastically planting them wherever and however it suits you. Some you place in locations where they thrive, while others wilt and die. Early on you see no problems, only opportunities as you continue to focus on the gifts continually arriving on your truck-from-the-universe. In short, you are gardening “in the moment.” Over time you plant flowers, trees, weeds, vines, shrubs and vegetables. And as you harvest and consume some of the fruits of your labours, you begin to not only live in the garden, the bounty of the garden becomes who and what you are. Your cells are literally made of the fruits of efforts, just as your experience is made of what you planted in your consciousness.

Eventually you become aware of other gardens and other gardeners. It is natural for these other gardeners to take an interest in your life-garden. The trouble begins when we begin comparing gardens. Like you, they have been happily planting away. But they are a different gardener than you. They must deal with differences in soil, water and shade, plus they have their own personal tastes regarding how they would like to see the plants placed. Because of this, some of yours will be flourishing while theirs may be struggling or failing. Likewise, some of yours will wilt and die while theirs grow vigorously. None of this is inherently good or bad, but the conversation between the gardeners eventually makes it appear so. This is the beginning of second-thoughts.

There is nothing good or bad, only thinking makes it so.
Shakespeare

Your original thoughts arrive more as feelings. The universe delivers a plant and you place it where you feel is best. You don’t question your decisions, you merely continue to plant your garden in whatever way suits you. But based on your second thoughts—which are really only a recounting of the experiences of other gardeners—you begin to have thought-conversations in your head and, in doing so, you begin to wonder if there’s somewhere better to plant this or that. Not wanting your garden to fail, you focus your energies on what’s not working. You study the plants that have struggled and died as though they will tell you how to make others grow well.

Eventually you get so invested in analyzing and judging your garden that you start to spend more time studying what you’ve already planted than you spend on what you’re planting in this present moment. Because you have been pricked by the odd cactus, you choose to believe that the cacti are mistakes that you don’t wish to repeat. You attempt to refuse deliveries, even going so far as to implore the universe “why you aren't you giving me what I want?”

Meanwhile the universe continues to send you all you need to build a garden you will love. But without your attention, many more plantings struggle and die than when you were actively planting each item in its own moment. Because of this, the garden can deteriorate even further, which only serves to drive you deeper into your analysis of what’s going wrong. And the more you study it, the more you notice the unflattering differences between your garden and those around you. The more you notice these “failings” the more you worry. The more you worry, the more you look for these damaging “failings.” It's a vicious cycle. Meanwhile you are increasingly ignoring the plants arriving in the present moment and, as they lay unattended, you attract even more “failure” to your future.

I am not in this world to live up to other people's expectations,
nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine.
Fritz Perls

Since you cannot dig up the past and replant it, your solution is really very simple. Stop questioning your deliveries for this is, in other words, questioning your own plan. You and the universe are cooperating in creating your garden, so you have a great partner. Silence the judgements of others that you hear in your mind’s ear. Their garden is theirs and yours is yours. Different soil and different light mean your context is completely different. And because your plan is also uniquely your own, the resources that flow to you are also different. Enjoy others' gardens as much as appeals to you, but do not feel yours should be like, better, or more popular than theirs. Let your mind go quiet and re-embrace the deliveries you are constantly receiving. In that quiet you will return to the realization that your only responsibility is to enjoy the process of planting in each moment. Certainly some plants will still not thrive or even survive, but such is the case with all gardens. It is by witnessing this that we become increasingly and silently skilful at knowing where to place the gifts arriving in this present moment. And so, as you expand your awareness, even your “failures” become useful to you. The plot of your life is your consciousness. In it you can easily realize all the beauty and bounty you could ever need. But to do so you need to be present to plant it.

And the very best part about this garden of life? Whether it's sunny or it's raining, it all helps you grow.

peace. s