Some nice mother or father or child likely created this graphic as a way of celebrating motherhood and mothers. And that’s an awesome idea. But the downside is that there are in reality tons and tons and tons of ill-suited, terrible, awful, and even dangerous mothers.
Maybe they just have Asperger’s and the kid needs to know that. Maybe they’re ill. Or poorly informed, or were treated badly and are very mean spirited. Regardless of the reason, there are definitely large numbers of children who are in one way or another, somehow neglected by, or are suffering at, the hands of their mothers (and their fathers).
If we have great parents we are smart to be super grateful. Because a huge number of people don’t. And those people end up feeling lonely and separate because quotes like this one lead them to believe that most people have parents from a TV sitcom.
Clearly not every family are the Cunningham’s from Happy Days. 25% of people have addictions. 50% of marriages fail and there’s a lot of fighting before they do. Even time is an issue.
In the new millennium, Mom’s are busy also being daughters, wives, household managers, corporate employees and/or business owners. The new millennium is a busy place and its machinery chews a lot of people up. Mom’s are tired.
If we happen to have a mother who didn’t mother, we should not let that hold us back at all because that is a huge percentage of the population. Large enough that we don’t even have to begin thinking of it as a problem for just us. If anything it can build strengths others do not have.
If you’re like me and are fortunate enough to have great parents, that’s great. But there’s lots of parents who got to be parents by accident. Some never had the appropriate qualities, despite being good people.
For whatever reasons, the fact is, some mothers can provide more challenges than possibilities. But we grow from both, so if we’re one of the people whose mom was neglectful, the reasons don’t matter. What matters is that no one lets that hold them back. Because with that many people sharing the experience, everyone’s in fantastic company.
A serious childhood brain injury lead Scott to spend his entire life meditating on the concepts of thought, consciousness, reality and identity. It made others as strange to him as he was to them. When he realized people were confused by their own over-thinking, Scott began teaching others to understand reality. He is currently CBC Radio Active’s Wellness Columnist, as well as a writer, speaker and mindfulness instructor based in Edmonton, AB where he still finds it strange to write about himself in the third person.