As people’s sense of reality generation becomes more sophisticated, one of the things they commonly note is that they often realize they need to change the way they phrase things in order to be consistent with their new understanding.
In addition to becoming more aware of how our language previously might have innocently misled others, we also become aware of how their may have misled us due to phrasing choices born from their own sense of reality.
This effect can sometimes make communication difficult, because our language was accidentally structured around so many false or ambiguous ideas that feel very real or certain to people –things like a consistent, shared reality.
A good example is where you feel you are handling a difficult day particularly well. Internally you feel proud, aware, clear-headed and active. So in fact you are quite happy with your success in managing a situation that guarantees losses.
But of course the person asking us how we are cannot see the details of our internal workings. They can just see the material losses. So since they believe in one reality, they are really asking how the day that surrounds you the thinker, would be described by other thinkers.
That means that they would see the honest answer would be for you to say, ‘yes, it is a difficult day.‘ And that is not dishonest if you take it from their perspective, as you know they will.
But of course that flies in the face of how we might really feel inside, which is empowered. This is why being honest is such a difficult thing. To whom? And when? And about what? Reality is a very slippery thing.
As you describe your reality to others, what sort of language do you use? Are you focused on what’s going right or wrong? Or are you focused on your own processing of those judgments?
Listen to yourself. And as you slowly grow wiser, moment by moment, opportunity by opportunity, just remember to think about how you phrase the world to yourself. Hidden in your description will be your perspective. Ensure it’s a healthy one. The rest is easy.
A serious childhood brain injury lead Scott to spend his entire life meditating on the concepts of thought, consciousness, reality and identity. It made others as strange to him as he was to them. When he realized people were confused by their own over-thinking, Scott began teaching others to understand reality. He is currently CBC Radio Active’s Wellness Columnist, as well as a writer, speaker and mindfulness instructor based in Edmonton, AB where he still finds it strange to write about himself in the third person.