People spend most of their lives searching for love outside of themselves, while the wisest ones learn that in the end we only experience the love we create within ourselves anyway.
We are beings that turn thoughts into biochemical responses which then appear to us as the emotional sum of an experience. So if you think you’re in love, you’re in love. If you’re wondering if you’re in love, then you’re definitely not in a state of love because you are in a state of wondering.
If someone else thinks a loving thought about you, their brain gets dosed with nice chemicals, not yours. You won’t even know they thought it unless they choose to tell you. But you are all-powerful within your own consciousness. You can love them, or anyone else, (or even yourself!), any time you choose. So it is your thoughts that lead to your brain being dosed with the very enjoyable chemistry for love, not the thoughts of others.
That is what it is to live consciously. Long before trying psychological medications, everyone should understand that wisdom is often achieved merely by maintaining mindfulness about the tone of our thinking and how that creates our moment to moment experience.
We all benefit from spending less time talking to ourselves and more time being mindful about the chemical tone of our current thought patterns. To choose an enjoyable life we must take responsibility and actively practice our ongoing roles as our own personal neuro-pharmacists.
You create your day with your thinking. It is your thought choices that create the feelings you experience. You won’t always have events work out in a way that is favourable to you—the Universe has a lot going on. But you will always have control over your reaction—over your personal thinking—so it is important to remain conscious of your ultimate responsibility for your emotional experience. We must all consciously use our own thinking to intentionally create the contented, enlightened life experiences we previously thought we had to find in the external world.
You have all you require for a happy life. There is nothing outside of you needed. Simply stay aware of the active role you play in creating your own psychology. And then use that awareness to create yourself an interesting, enjoyable, rewarding, friendly day. Because you will always be the only person who has the power to do that.
Scott McPherson is an Edmonton-based writer, public speaker, and mindfulness facilitator who works with individuals, companies and non-profit organizations locally and around the world.
A serious childhood brain injury lead Scott to spend his entire life meditating on the concepts of thought, consciousness, reality and identity. It made others as strange to him as he was to them. When he realized people were confused by their own over-thinking, Scott began teaching others to understand reality. He is currently CBC Radio Active’s Wellness Columnist, as well as a writer, speaker and mindfulness instructor based in Edmonton, AB where he still finds it strange to write about himself in the third person.